on bangs

Hairdressers should be required to have clients sign waivers before cutting bangs. Waivers that entail the intense work it will be to not only deal with the bangs, but then to grow them out once you are sick of dealing with them. (about 1.5 days). counseling sessions should be offered before getting bangs cut, much like gender changes and getting ones tubes tied, and plastic surgery. one should be reminded by friends and family about the most recent bangs incident, and how much prozac it took you to recover. seriously. unlike grieving the loss of an entire mane of hair chopped off in a random moment of spontaneous revolt, cutting bangs is like dipping your toe in the black sea of rebellion and then having to live with the memory of how that hair used to be as pretty as the rest of your hair, but now is either too long, too short, too curly, or too straight, and mostly just hidden by a hat. which leads me to another rant... why do some workplaces not allow hats? not cool.